What I Did On Summer Vacation By Tricia

"Them bikes be like 'waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa'""the pool isnt so bad once your legs go numb""wheres the gas grill? all i see is this park grill piece of crap???""holy shit look at that spider!""I have sand everywhere. *wipes sand on K's arm*. Sand from my ass. you are welcome." "hey look! the sun is out! oh wait...nevermind" "sound good cause they free....shewt" "jerry is back on dish duty tomorrow" "We are sooooo gonna regret this tomorrow *giggle and clink shot glasses* HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANYWAY!" "is Erin alive? Yeah I texted her twice earlier she is alive. hahah you texted her?!?!" "so what did you drink? Lemon drops. Amateur. $150 of lemon drops. Holy shit! That's like professional." "I wonder what the kitties are doing right now? Plotting our demise, probably" "Thats from just today in the sun? Yeah. I hate you. I really hate you." "HOW MUCH FOOD DID YOU GUYS BUY ANYWAY!" "FOOZBALL IS THE DEVIL" "WE NEE MO WAX!" "Is the pool warm? Uh *shiver* no" "We are out of beer. WHAT!?! We are out of beer. How the hell?!!? What I meant to say was, we are out of beer." "Holy shit check out the ceiling. eww" "I think maybe next time, you should think about a bigger truck" "YOU DIDNT SAY LAST CARD!!!!! Yes I did! Oh. Damnit." "Theres images flying around in my head that I really didnt need" "damn dude, your burps are awful" "That's a lot of cake. Yeah umm. apparently 1/2 a sheet is smaller in my head" "Yeah, Shewt"

I don't know what I've been told...

Skinny Tricia's got a lot of soul!

SO! I FOUND! AN OUTSIDE BOOTCAMP CLASS! IN MY AREA!

It's Monday/Wednesday/Friday at 7pm just down the street from my house.

I'm so excited! I think I just peed a little!

$5-$8/session which is roughly $65/month

hi. one personal trainer session for one hour was gonna be $60.

lsdkjfslkfjsldkfjsdlfkjSQWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

AND AND AND YOU GET THE FIRST WEEK FOR FREE.

Class starts first Monday of Oktober. Yes, I said oKtober. Hey Look! I'm German!

So, who's down for it. CMON! You know you wanna! Cluss? Harm? Erin? Karri? BF? *taps foot*

Of course, I am already apprehensive about a couple of things:

1. I can't run to save my life. No really, if someone was chasing me, it wouldn't be that hard to catch up. heck they'd prolly run right past me


2. the idea of a "bootcamp" workout scares the crap out of me. Army visions are flooding my head. "Gump! What's your sole purpose in this army?" "To do whatever you tell me, Drill Sergeant!" (see! There's a forrest gump quote for every occasion! believe me now?)


3. omg. running. ick

I'm sure more will come to me.

My god I am excited. lasdkjflsdkfjsldf

P.S. The title reminds me of a cheer from my high school. heh. ya ready? (ok!)

I DONT KNOW WHAT IVE BEEN TOLD
i dont know what ive been told

CLARK COUGARS GOTTA ALOTTA SOUL
clark cougars gotta alotta soul

WE GOTTA TEAM THATS GO GO GO
we gotta team thats go go go

WE ARE THE BEST AND YOU SHOULD KNOW
we are the best and you should know

BOM BOM CHICKAMOM BOM *clap*
BOM BOM CHICAMOM BOM HEEEEEEEY *clap*
BOM BOM CHICKAMOM BOM *clap*
BOM BOM CHICAMOM BOM HEEEEEEEY *clap*
BOM!

i crack myself up.

And now back to your regularly scheduled programming...

Well obviously, I had to take that shit down.

Theres honest and then theres ballsOutYouShouldntBePuttingThatShitOutForAllTheWorldToSeeYou
HormonalFemale honest.

heh, sorry if you missed it ;)

anyway...

two days til vacation *hop*-didnt even need my fingers to figure that one out.

still not smoking *hop*

(to those who had the pleasure of reading that other post before i deleted...it's like jekyll and hyde, no? Welcome to my world, kids.)

still not sleeping very well.

hmm... how about a list!

Things I am looking forward to on vacation:

1. Being with BF sans laptop-- HA HA I make myself laugh. I still have hope he wont bring it though.


2. Lazy days on beach or poolside talking about everything and nothing with my girls ;)


3. Sunburn. I DONT CARE THAT THERES A TROPICAL DEPRESSION currently plotting its ruining of my vacation in the atlantic ocean! I AM GOING TO GET A SUNBURN DAMNIT *stomp*


4. Sweet sweet notHavingAnythingToDoGoodness


5. Not working for 6 Business Days *happy sigh


6. Not having to wear pantyhose for said 6 Business Days--yeah whatever, I don't usually wear pantyhose anyway. Details..details..


7. Grilled food every single night. Love grilled food


8. beer!


9. Wardrobe consisting of: shorts, tshirts, bathing suit. sweet.


10. omg did i say no working for 6 business days?!?! woohoo

Status: Day 5

ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME is still smoke free :P

but umm. not doing so well with a couple of the rules though.

I am...
totally riding the emotional rollercoaster.
totally screaming at people while driving for not really valid reasons.
totally not overeating!
totally hardly eating at all, which aint good either.
totally not sleeping well.
totally late for carpool every single day this week.
totally loving the new kitten.
totally making sure the other two get love too. Im an equal opportunity lover, see.
totally not sleeping well.
totally getting things done after work, which, hello. this is unheard of.
totally rid my car of all ash and smokey smells, car is so fresh and so clean clean.
totally not sleeping well.
totally awake at night when i should be tired, yet exhausted throughout the day.
totally glad i am alone this week to wrestle with my emotional rollercoaster.
totally not glad i will also be alone next week. bah. i hate your job bf. really. H.A.T.E.
totally forgot my patch yesterday and didnt use that as an excuse to smoke. score!
totally not sleeping well.
totally have been alone since Sunday night people! and! have not smoked! Not once! Me! Not Sneaking! Not Smoking!
totally havent gotten to the gym once yet this week. awesome.
totally cant find my circle of friends bracelet :(

and yet...

totally proud of myself (totally).

I know, I know, its not even a week yet. hush up--this junx is hard!

The birthday fairy...

The morning of my birthday I was awoken by a kitten on kitty crack who had confused the bed for a kitty race track in which to chase invisible things and pausing momentarily for dizzying spins to chase that illusive black thing behind her that keeps following her. HER TAIL.

I watch for a few moments, willing myself awake. I notice I am alone. BF had to go to DMV--a long drawn out story that is kinda funny but not really mine to tell.

I continue to lay there thinking "hey! its my birthday! I dont have to do diddly squat today! yay!" and then my short-term memory kicked in and made me realize that this was not really the case.

I mean really, once you are past the 12 year old mark that really is never the case. ever. OK OK OK 25..whatever, same thing.

Anyway, so BF gets home and I am still in bed. He gets in bed and tells me the woes of the DMV and then he falls asleep. I decide that perhaps I should get up cuz I was having maids come and clean my house (weee! happy birthday to me! no seriously, OTHER.PEOPLE.ARE.GONNA.CLEAN.MY.HOUSE. how awesome is that?)

So I get up and start to pick up whatever I did not pick up the night before and then I start to...

...get pissed off?

an hour later I wake up the BF, seething, and start yelling about he didnt do this and he didnt do that (and god. HOW he puts up with me I will never know) and then I start to cry cuz "OMG YOU HAVENT EVEN SAID HAPPY BIRTHDAY YET!"

Hi. My name is Tricia. I am a spoiled brat. Im also quitting smoking. Dont come near me.

He looks at me, bleary-eyed, and goes "im sorry, im just so tired."

it's about this time that I realize I am an uber bitch and that I should shut-up. So I go into the guest room and lay there and try to get my shit together cuz O.M.G. WHAT A BITCH I AM.

time passes, a friend of ours calls and sings me Happy birthday. I cry again. One of my brothers calls and sings to me too, again with the waterworks.

maids come, I do laundry. We have dinner with my parents.

and then I head over to my friends house, KEGOFSUNSHINE, to help her out with the slumber party for 12 12-year-olds she is hosting.

I get out of the car, walk up the sidewalk and knock on the door. I can hear the TV on. She opens the door with a GIGANTIC smile on her face (but this is normal). The lights are off, the girls are watching a movie, she leads me into the dark kitchen where there are flowers and balloons and a cake in the shape of a heart with candles on it. She and her daughters start singing to me and I start to cry. The girls giggled and Tricia, her daughter said "so this is what they mean by crying cuz you are happy?" Which made me laugh cuz wow kids are pretty perceptive.

She then leads me upstairs and hands me my birthday present with two cards. One is from the girls and one is from her. I got candles and car freshner and a cd i wanted.

She made me feel so special. I love you birthday fairy.

A contract with myself

Let it be known that I, Tricia, do solemnly swear on this 25th day of August in the year of our lord 2006, by the power vested in me by the state of willpower and having a freaking spine that I will smoke no longer and fear no evil. *twitch*

Tricia, heretofore referred to as "ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME" will abide by the following contractual obligations:

1. ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME will NOT under any circumstances purchase any nicotine products with the exception of Nicotrol and Nicoderm CQ should she require the assistance. *twitch*



2. When ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME's BF is out of town, this does not give her the right to sneak cigarettes. "No one will know but me" is something of the past.



3. Even while drinking, ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME will not partake of any nicotine substance, other than the exceptions previously listed (see rule #1)



4. Upon the occurrence of drama and/or pain and/or anger, ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME will not succum to the evil cigarette.



5. *twitch* ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME will do her best to NOT ride the emotional rollercoaster that is withdrawal and will instead lavish herself with perfume and all things pretty smelling in celebration of not smelling like an ashtray.She will also wear her circle of friends bracelet with pride and will will (heh) her strength from this bracelet and what it stands for.



6. ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME will not, under any circumstances replace her nicotine addiction with any other addiction such as food, caffeine, yelling at people, etc.



7. ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME will reward herself appropriately and as she sees fit. She will ignore the eye rolls and the "uh huhs" she will receive from her supportive friends and family when she announces to them that she has in fact decided to quit smoking for the 10983409238409328th time. This will not phase her. She will instead use that negative energy to reinforce that "DAMNIT I CAN DO THIS" and prove all you poops wrong, for once.



8. ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME will not be upset when people (aka BF) does not notice that she is in fact, not smoking. She will realize that eventhough this is the hardest thing she has had to do so far in life (omg the dramatics), not everyone has any FUCKING CLUE what it really means to quit smoking. She will instead support herself (see #7).



9. During those rough times, ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME, will go to the gym or take a yoga class.



10. ITSABOUTFUCKINGTIME is giving herself life as her birthday present to herself, beginning on the day before her 29th birthday. She will remember that this is the first step in the life of a healthy person and that this is a good thing and not OMG THE TORTURE OF IT ALL!

I, Tricia, will abide by the contractual obligations set forth in this document.

Signed,

Tricia

*twitch* pinky swear. *twitch*

Introducing...Molly!

Hi!

Gimme the string, or the hand gets it.


Hey! Gimme!

okokokok I will stop...

But first! Here is some pics of the other two goobers. very funny expressions


You got WHAT at PetSmart?!?!?!


I am not amused.

OMG I'm the Cat Lady Now!!!

The boyfriend and I went over to Petsmart after dinner last night in search of these pill pockets jibbers in which to trick Blackberry into taking her medicine. I was determined to find these suckers but I guess the bf wasn't as interested cuz..

a. 2 minutes into being in the store he goes "yeah, I don't see them, lets go."
b. 5 minutes later he goes "ill just stop by the vet tomorrow, c'mon."

I shoulda said "ok" and off we would have gone.

but umm. no. I asked several people. found myself in the doggy aisles cuz hey! that makes sense! We did actually find some but they were beef...cuz..you know... DOGS LIKE BEEF.

Defeated, we walk away and then he says "there is the cutest kitten over there. all she wants is the pets." "The pets." I know it sounds odd to me too. Maybe its cuz im new to this whole pet-owner thing *shrug*. Ya'll know "the pets?"

Nevermind im getting distracted.

Anyway, so the thought of a cute kitten turns me into this giggling little girl, so I say "well, you know we are gonna have to go over there now."

big. effing. mistake.

I go inside the cat area and start petting, or giving "the pets" (wtf? is that weird to just me?) to the babies. I "aww" and "sweet baby" them all and then decide that maybe its time to leave. As I am walking out the cute one bf was talking about earlier sticks her paw out and it touches my shoulder. She does it again and her paw touches my face. My heart melts. But still! I move forward and out of the room.

We stop and read the little info sticker on her. As I am reading, bf goes "if you want her, you can have her."

omg I got this big grin on my face and said "ARE YOU SERIOUS!?!?!"

he goes, "yeah." Apparently mine was not the only heart that melted.

"OMG! for my birthday *high pitched voice*???" (which, hmph. now no sparkly somethin. poo)

he says "sure." I am positive he is thinking "sweet! now I dont have to get her a gift!"

anyway anyway anyway. point is.

theres a 10-monthweek old kitty in my bathroom. She is the sweetest thing ever and starts to purr the minute you pick her up.

Her name is Molly.

Welcome to the family sweet girl.

oh and PS. the other two are LIVID. ha.

In recent news. . .

Tricia finally got some sleep! I know! I was cranky about it too!

It started Monday coincidentally/uncoincidentally when the bf went out of town (YET EFFING AGAIN...man "local travel only"--my freshly waxed ass). The last time I looked at the clock that night it was 2:30 am. My alarm goes off at 5:45 am. sweet.

Tuesday, I was up til 1:30 which was an improvement, however, MY ALARM GOES OFF AT 5:45AM! heh.

Wednesday, I WAS UP TIL FOUR AM. YES FOUR. To add insult to injury, carpool was going in to work early thursday morning, so my alarm went off at FIVE AM. gah.

Thursday, aside from Chiropractor appointment, I had nothing planned and good thing too. I went to bed at 1030. sweet relief.

Friday went to bed at midnight but not cuz I wasnt tired but because it was Friday and I always feel its lame to go to bed early on Friday. *shrug*

I slept til one on saturday though *happy sigh*

No issues since. phew. My chiropractor suggested I start taking a supplement called Sumi-e or SOOMEE or some shit. To regulate my "seratonin" which will help me sleep.

Hey I will try anything at this point.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remember this story? Well after being severly violated, I had dinner with K. And she...

...asked me to be her Maid of Honor. SQWEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

omgomgomgomg I'm soooo excited about it! I felt all beauty pagaent like with the shocked face and hands covering my mouth "OMG! ME?!?!?"

haha I am a tard. yes.

Thank you K, you have made me feel very special. Whatever you need, I'm there dude.

I've already started research on maid-of-honor duties and hoooooooooooooooooooleeeee shizah! That's a lot of stuff!

I'm totally up for it though!

again, SQWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm dropping some poundage inexplicably. But hey, no complaints here! If I could only pinpoint what it is that I am doing and continue that...hmm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In other news, I turn 29 in like *counts on fingers* 5 (no, I really did count on my fingers) days. I've decided that perhaps this is a good time to consider quitting smoking. (ah shut-up, the lot of you!) We shall see. I feel I am ready. Though, I thought was ready the last 293872938742938 times. *sigh*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have resisted checking statcounter.com all weekend. *twitch* Im ok *doubletwitch*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

20 days til Vacation! Is it just me or is time standing-still. TICK TOCK DAMNIT Bring on the Vacation already! *stomps foot*

Oh hah. Obviously I miscounted the first time. sheesh. I bet I didnt use my fingers that time.

Neuroses

I have noticed lately that omg! I am a freak!

Claudia showed me all about statscounter.com and well, I am now obsessed. There are like two of you out there that I haven't the faintest clue who you are but...

it says you have been on my blog for 23 hours 4 minutes and 20 seconds and umm...

that sort of...i dunno...wigs me out?

Anyway, this obsessive checking of my stats has also made me realize that I have quite a number of neuroses...quirks, if you will. *cough*

1. I refresh statscounter.com all day long


2. I check my blog for comments EVENTHOUGH I have it set up to email me when someone comments. (and btw. COMMENT YA TURDS)


3. I worry about whether or not I locked my car..all. the. time.


4. I set and check my alarm clock at least 5 times before I am satisfied that it is set. And yet? I still somehow screw it up and end up late to work occassionally


5. at 1/2 of a tank I start to worry about getting stranded with no gas. I never have less than 1/4 of a tank.


6. When I have like 5 cigarettes left in my pack, I'm like "OH NO! What if I run out before the end of the day! and then go in to conserve mode


7. After I smoke for the last time at night, when I am home alone, I do this thing where I lock the back door and turn off the light, put the key on the table and walk to the end of the kitchen, turn off the light, pause, turn the light back on, turn around and check to see if I locked the door. Then I put the alarm on, turn the light off, put it back on, turn around and check again. Turn the light off. Then I walk to the hallway, put the stair light on, turn the foyer light on check that the front door is locked, turn the foyer light off, back on and check, back off and walk upstairs. Yes, I am serious.


8. I am anal about having 39028420498 windows open on my computer. Must keep it all neat and tidy


9. Also anal about the order of my databases that are open. again, neat and tidy!


10. I cannot work until my desk is neat and tidy


11. If I write a post-it and it is messy, I rewrite...sometimes I do it more than once


12. I have found myself rewriting meeting notes. cuz! omg! messy!


13. Dishes must be done the same night. The boyfriend and I have different views on the subject and have had heated debates. Yet? When he is out of town, I don't really care so much.


14. I find myself washing my hands twice in a row each time I go to the bathroom. I only do it at work (the twice part, I mean).


15. Oh yeah, this stuff too

yup. still a weirdo.

House of Wax

Before I dive in, I should warn those of the male gender to just skip this post.

Really, its not interesting. It's all pink and fluffy and girly. With Fairies and Unicorns and Rainbow Brites.

No seriously, scoot the hell on.

I mean it!

Alright fine. Read if you must. But don't say I didn't warn ya...

So today after work, I received my first waxing....uhhh... downstairs.

*gasp* I know! Let me tell you, I have been freaked out all day about it.

Now usually, I take care of business on my own, but my friend had just done it and said it wasnt all that bad (E YOU LIE LIKE A DOG. Bitch. :P) and I am going to the beach for a week the week after labor day and well you know...one less thing to stress about. I have been getting my eyebrows and manlip waxed since...I dunno...high school, when I decided the brooke shields unibrow was so over. So I had an idea what I was in for (OR ya know, so I thought).

also? the manlip? God definitely has a sense of humor.

Yeah. HA HA. *growl*

I defy you to be half spanish and half german and NOT grow some hair.

ANYWAY.

Im driving along and about halfway there I guess it started to sink in--more--where I was traveling to and what my purpose was. Suddenly I got OB/GYN Waiting Room Bladder. You know the one. While you are sitting there waiting nervously, suddenly you go "Oh crap I have to pee! I should pee! Maybe I should wait til they call my name and then I will pee. Wait! I dont have to pee! OK OK OK I'm not gonna pee! Cuz! I totally don't have to!" and then you get undressed and on the table and you are all "FUCK. I SHOULD HAVE GODDAMN PEED!" Yeah, you know the one.

I told you fools to skip this one. Believe me now?

So I get to my appointment early. Accidently on purpose, hoping to get this over and done with quicker than planned. I got lucky and she was waiting for me. With her dark eyes and crooked evil grin. She knows she is evil.

So we walk to the back room and she asks me how I am doing. I say "Oh, I'm fine. This is my first time doing this so I am a bit nervous."

"bit"--understatement of the century.

She chuckles a little and says "ohhhhhhhh you'll be fine" Then I swear I heard an evil cackle. I tilt my head and look at her like "was that you?" She of course has no idea why the hell I am looking at her that way cuz I am obviously exaggerating for entertainment purposes. The following, I am afraid, is no exaggeration...

So we get in the room and she goes "so do you want to wear your own panties or do you want to wear these paper ones?" and she dangles this piece of string with a cocktail napkin glued to it.

Hi. I just said I have never done this before. HOW THE HELL DO I KNOW.

So I say "uhh...wow those are gonna be attractive (nervous laugh)...uhh I dunno...what is better?"

She shrugs and goes "Try these this time and see if you like them." And she leaves to give me some privacy. Which, I appreciated but learned later there was really no point to the privacy. I guess it's the thought of decorum that makes people feel more at ease.

Anyway so I put on the cocktail napkin on a string and climb onto the table and then I go "damnit. I should have peed!"

She knocks on the door and comes back in. She messes around at the counter behind me. Puts a towel on my lap and says "its not warm enough yet. I will be back."

WTF? Don't you do this all damn day. HOW could it not be warm enough?

Ugh so I sit and wait and look around at the walls. I looked up at the ceiling to see if there was a "hang in there baby poster" like my OB/GYN has on her ceiling (which ha ha awww so cute. wtf?) and was relieved to not find one.

She comes back in and messes around at the counter behind me and comes over in front of me with this glob of goo in her hand. --For those that know what I am talking about, I was being "sugared", not waxed. It's apparently better and "hurts less." sha. right.--She says "see this is the sugar, It is real sugar, you can even eat it."

Oddly enough, I am not hungry right now. But thanks! Good to know!

So she begins.

Then comes the searing pain. "HOLY SHIT! DID SHE JUST TAKE OFF MY SKIN!?!?!"

She blows on it. (WTF?) and goes "you good?"

Yeah. Im fantastic. May I have another?

The pain and the "OMG I WILL PAY YOU A MILLION DOLLARS TO STOP" and the blowing (seriously, wtf?) and the "you good?!!?!" at every single rip continues. Then she goes "OK! Almost done! Time to turn on your side."

um.

say what?

Well I wont go into detail but you get the idea.

Man, the things we girls do. sheesh.

Dentist Woes (man, I sure do complain a lot)

In the spring of 2004, I decided to suck it up and finally get my teeth straightened. I had seen Invisalign commercials and other propaganda a couple of times before and the whole "invisible" aspect of it really appealed to me. Looking like a 14 year old with a mouth full of metal? Not so much. I brought up the idea to my dentist because he had pamphlets and what not around his waiting room. Turns out, he is an authorized Invisalign "provider" so I did not even have to go to an Orthodontist! Bonus!

Anyway so we started the process of molds and pictures and back and forth with Invisalign to get just the right treatment. $4k later, I had invisible braces. The day I got them I was totally psyched about it...before the appointment. After the appointment, when I was back at work with a throbbing mouth? Umm...let's just say the excitement had disappated. Or should I say dispfffffffffffffffpated since I now talk like the sister on southpark.


Also, after I got my invisible braces when someone would mention something or see me putting them on or taking them off. I would get all giddy about it and then they would say "ya know, I never noticed that you needed braces."

awesome. so what am i paying $4k for, again?

So let's fast forward to this past April when I am on my 13th and final tray. Only. My teeth arent quite straight. and honestly? For $4k they better be perfect. Lucky for me, Invisalign offers one "refinement" for free. A refinement is basically another round of trays. OK, cool. So I go in and get another round of molds and pictures and am told it will take 2 to 3 weeks. This was April 6th.

May...nothing
June.. nothing
July... "Oh the doctor is busy with a patient can I have him call you back?"
July 12th...still no call. So I call back...in bitch mode...Phone call goes something like...

Ring

"Dr. aslkdjflskdjflsdfk's office, how may I help you?"

"Hi Elizabeth, this is Tricia, I still haven't heard from Dr. dslkfjsldfjsdlfkj, is he available?"

"This isn't Elizabeth, she is out of the country"

silence.

"mmmmmkkkay. Still need to know whats up with my Invisalign."

"He is busy with a patient, can I have him call you back"

"You could, but he isn't in to returning calls, can you tell me when he has an opening today so I can call then?"

"uh, hold on"

Dr. lsdkjflsdkfjlsafdj "Hey Trish! How's it going! Listen, I am so sorry this is taking so long theres been some problems with blah blah blah Im a male ditz blah blah blah. I will call you when I hear something. Oh! and I will give you a free whitening treatment to hopefully make up for you having to wait so long"

Me: "Oh cool! Sounds good! Hope to hear from you soon!"

Click

August 2nd, still no call. So I call cuz...damnit WTF?!?!

He answers the phone this time... haha. busted.

"Hey Dr. lkdsjflsdkjflsdfkjsdf, this is Tricia. Just calling to see whats up with my Invisalign stuff."

"I don't know what to tell you, it isnt here. And its only been like 3 weeks"

"well, its been 4 months actually, but ok"

"Yeah, theres been some problems with blah blah blah blah blah (general blowing smoke up my ass)"

"Well can you tell me how many more trays there are gonna be?"

"Hmm. Well I don't have that information in front of me, I will have to check my email. Can I call you back?"

"Yeah *looks at clock, its 330* I leave work at 4, so can you please call my cell phone"

"sure thing, I will call you at 430"

"ok"

click.

430...440...500....600..700. DAMNIT!

On a whim, I check my email, and lo...he sent me an email instead. Here it is, and I swear I have not modified a single letter:

"Dear Tricia,

I apologize again for the delay in your treatment. Initially in May it was my fault for not sending the case in for refinement until mid June. Then I went through the case submission process which has slightly changed this past 5 months, meaning there is a consultation firm (called PSA) contracting with Invisalign that pre-approves the steps, then it gets forwarded to me by which time I found out it was being treated as a NEW case with a new charge. I had to resubmit the submission package again since I wanted a refinement, you are not a new patient. Then from there the clincheck (which is the 3D modeling of your teeth) was done once by me which I didn't approve (15 aligners schedualed was not acceptable by me) so I submitted back with some changes that I requested. The screen capture file that I sent you has a new clincheck back by 8/17...however, I called them after talkign to you on Frid 4:20 ; they'll expedite the case. I'm sure everything will be ready to go by next week for the final manufacturing of the trays. I will forward the movie of the FINAL stages of teeth movement (CLINCHECK) to you as soon as I have it (that's how I would know exactly how many aligners are fabricated for your treatment). If you would like to examine it in 3D and give it one last approval you can pop-on over next week. It should take no more than 10 minutes. So I don't have a correct # of aligner answer for you now, but I'm guessing 9 aligners.

Also for your trouble of waiting so long, I'll be given you a take home bleaching treatment that is usually $300-400 at no charge. I'm sure you'll like your whiter/brighter smile over the years after this orthodontic treatment is over. If you don't want the whitening treatment, I'm willing to give you a brand new Sonicare Elite Professional package (model 7800)that retails for 160$. Again I feel bad for your delay and willing to give you a gift to hopefully make up for it.

Thanks for waiting patiently.

Have a good weekend.

Dr. ldkjsflsdkjflasdkfj, DDS"


When I first read this, I was like...YOU SOB!!!! This is your fault! s;ldfjsl;dfkjsl;dfkjl;dsfkj;dslfkjdslfkjds various other venting.

and then I realized. Man, at least he is honest (finally) and hell Im gonna get some free shit out of the deal. I was hoping to be done with this by the end of the summer...

but meh...

thats just how shit goes down in my world...:P

a hodgepodge o'stuff

For the first time in just over a month, I did my laundry in MY OWN HOUSE people! I don't think I have EVER been so psyched to do laundry in my life!

I also did yardwork, which btw?, OW OW OW OW. Seriously, I feel like I am walking funny. And bending over? oy. ouchies.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The boyfriend is going out of town for yet another week, and I have filled my week up with miscellaneous activities to keep me from realizing that he is in fact gone. Why it is so much harder for me with him gone than before I will probably never know. But what I do know? Is that I love him to bits. I feel it getting stonger lately.

and eventhough he drives me nuts with his half-ass attempts at helping out around the house. At least he is trying? Yes. This is how I will look at it. Otherwise? Ima beat him. So this is probably the better outlook for both my sanity and his unbruised skin.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am contemplating hiring a personal trainer to get me motivated. While this seems like a fantastic idea, when I look at the numbers, my checkbook runs and hides....

1 Session $60
6 Sessions: $348
12 Sessions: $672
18 Sessions: $972
24 Sessions: $1248

*gulp*

Hey uh, anyone know a private trainer that is cheaper and has a gold's gym membership?

heh. crap.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

oh and? 25 days til outer banks goodness. hot diggity dog.

Blood Pressure a'risin...a Story of Dryer Woes

so, my DRYER ISN'T FIXED YET.

YES, thats a month now of a non-working dryer. I'm so mad I could just spit (as my mom says). Here's some background:

July 8th - Me: OH FUCLASKJOIWEOFCRAPITALLTOHELL. Boyfriendddddddddddddddddddddd the dryer isn't workinggggggggggggg againnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.

July 14th - First available appointment with GE repairdude. "Repair dude: Hmm ok so its your temperature thingy" ("thingy" - this is what my poor little female brain calls everything I cannot remember the name of). "Repair dude: Let me go out to the truck and see if I have the part" ....10 mins later..."Repair dude: Nope! I dont have that part! But I will order it and ship it here, here's my cell, call me when it comes in."

July 20th - 7PM(ish) - Phone rings. "Me: Hello?" "Automated Voice: This is GE Calling to confirm your appointment for tomorrow between 1 and 5pm. Press 1 to confirm." Blank stare to boyfriend. "Me: hmm...ok" Presses 1 on phone, and hangs up "So ok, we don't have the part, but we have an appointment. So either he pre-made the appointment and he is gonna show up and we have no part. OR he's an idiot and didnt ship it to the right place. cool."

July 21st - "Boyfriend: So, repairdude just called to say he was on his way. I asked him if he had the part cuz we sure don't and he doesn't so he isnt coming. If the part comes before 3pm (when he stops working for the day) then he will come. Otherwise, he will come on monday." "Me: sigh, ok"

3:30PM - package arrives. effing. brilliant.

July 24th - Different repair dude figures out that the previous repair dude misdiagnosed and he will have to order another part cuz! itsnotonthef------truck!

btw, WHAT THE HELL DO THEY HAVE ON THE DAMN TRUCK THEN I ASK!?!?!

July 28th - Repair dude comes in the morning vs. the afternoon when the appointment was supposed to be. So we have the duct guy in there sucking out whatever crap there is in the duct (which, btw THERE WASNT ANYTHING) and this repair dude idiot who spends at least 30 minutes on his walkie talkie with another dude who is walking him through how to put the machine back together (btw, W.T.F.!?!?!) ---oh and, while i was making conversation with the dear boy he tells me he is in an apprentice program and has been only doing this for 5 months.

me: outside: oh really? hmm interesting. inside: )#(*@)($*@#)$(*#@)*$)@#(*)@#(*

repairdude: starts dryer, waits a couple of seconds, sticks hand in dryer and says "see, all fixed. that'll be $149.99"

me: outside: "oh? I thought we were getting the part for free" him: "yes ma'am, this is only labor"

me: inside- "here, should I bend over this way or is there some other way you would like to do this" outside- hands over credit card

July 31st - at home. rash on hands (don't ask). Decide to finally get around to doing laundry since this is about the only thing I am capable of all drugged up.

1 hr later: check dryer. OH HELL NO! THERES NO LASKJFLSDK HEAT. omg omg omg omg.im gonna stab people.

5 minutes later: back on phone with uber polite GE people *cough* blood pressure rises, and I get all twitchy. "No earlier appts than August 7th? umm.. I.DONT.THINK.SO. *various yelling and screaming and LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR SUPERVISOR.NOW.*" "appointment on the 3rd between 1 and 5 pm? fantastic. I have to take more time off work! Yay! *seethe* inside: YOU PEOPLE F'ING SUCK!

August 3rd - Repair dude from the first appointment: "sooooo....still having problems" Me: bites tongue very hard "yup *sigh*" Repair dude on phone with tech people and customer relations blah blah blah and me getting on phone and yelling and screaming and LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR SUPERVISOR RIGHT NOW. repair dude leaves me with list of parts needed (that are backordered--OF COURSE THEY ARE!). Also? these parts? SAME SHITS THAT WERE REPLACED THE FRIDAY BEFORE. YES. Half a load in the dryer and pfffffft dead parts. excellent.

my god. if you have made it this far in this post. you have earned yourself a gold star.

let me wrap it up. Basically after yelling and screaming and twitching. We will be getting a new machine!

for the low low price of $240.

It is a $800 machine so I guess we are getting a good deal and we are going to have a year warranty on it and if the machine breaks in the first seven days (which, for the love of god it better not!) they will replace it and not try to repair--for free.

also, it will be here in five to seven business days. lasdkjflskdjflsdfkjslfdk

I was gonna also write about my dentist woes but gah. im done here.

I didnt even have to use my A.K., I got to say was (IS) a good day

ahhh ice cube...

Anyway lots of things about today are fantastico, I will enumerate, however one is no more important than the other.

1. Sweet sweet chiropractic goodness. Now, eventhough the shoulder is still throbbing and when I stop typing my pink sorta uh keeps moving, I feel as though I am on the road to recovery and that is a blessed thought *happy sigh*


2. I got to wear jeans today. Sure, I have to pay $3 to wear the jeans but, so friggin what. I.GET.TO.WEAR.JEANS. If it was free, sure that'd be sweeter, but I live in reality and this is plenty sweet for me :)


3. I HAVE A DATE TONIGHT! *giggle* Yes, alright it is with the dude I live with and YES FINE its with the dude I have spent the last decade with but HOLY CRAP! We are gonna like GET DRESSED UP! AND GO EAT AT RUTH'S CHRIS! I MIGHT EVEN WEAR A SKIRT! And, alright fine, his work is paying for it in appreciation for significant others who put up with all the BS, but hey! We are going to a place with like CLOTH NAPKINS! And it is no one's birthday! sweet.


4. CAR.POOL. and it's not my week to drive. and it's not my week next week either! oh happy day!


5. I dont feel overly vile and ugly today, though I am sure I do look it. I am ignorning it!


6. IT'S FRIGGIN FRIDAY BITCHES! YEEHAW!


7. Our dryer just might get fixed today! So our dryer died like 3 weeks ago. I stayed home last friday so that the repairman could come fix the silly thing (this is the second time since we purchased the sucker in 04) but, of course, he didnt have the part in the truck. Cuz, ya know, why bother carrying parts in a repair truck? That'd be silly. So the part is to be shipped to our house and then we are to call the feller on his cell and he will come over and finish the fixin'. So I call him yesterday cuz WTF NO PART YET!?!?! and left a message for him to call me back with perhaps some tracking information or maybe who I can talk to instead to find status of said part. No call, but we did get a call from GE confirming our appointment for today. Which means 1 of 2 things:
   
   
   
   1. He got the part and made the appointment,
   
   
   2. He made the appointment last week when he ordered the part and he is going to come over and we will have no part. We'll see how it goes but wouldnt that be cool if it was #1?


8. I am still exhausted, but I got an actual good nights sleep last night. (Bless you sleepy time tea) and I've got 7.5 hours left in my work day. sweet.


9. I am eating oatmeal for breakfast like a good girl, finally.


10. ITS FRICKIN FRIDAY BITCHES!

:)

She turns a corner . . .

A couple of weeks ago I was having a conversation with my mom over the phone. I had her on speaker phone and the tv was muted. The BF sat silently as I tried desperately to end the phone call, then she said "sssssoooooooo, when are you two going to get engaged?" She has no idea I have her on speakerphone. My stomach drops, my teeth start grinding and I try not to make eye-contact with him and just look at the floor. I stick my foot out and start wiggling my toes in admiration of a fairly new pedicure when I say something like "Mom, there are some things that we need to work on. I want to marry into a relationship that is solid and good. Give it time." She said "Well I am so proud to hear you say that" and something else I cannot remember. Then we get off the phone.

I beam with pride and smile at him and say "so, how was that?"

he said "very good! Listen I have to tell you something...K and J are engaged."

my heart stops beating for a second and I immediately tear up and smile uncontrollably.

"WHAT!?!?!ARE YOU KIDDING!?!?!OMG THATS SO GREAT!!!WAIT I GOTTA CALL HER [pick up phone and start dialing] WHEN!?!?! OMG!"

she picks up and I start gushing about how excited I am for her and what does the ring look like and how did he do it, etc. etc.

A while into the conversation she goes "I wasn't ignoring you, the BF told me not to tell you."

I look up at him and he is obviously avoiding eye-contact, peering deliberately at his laptop screen.

"oh, uh...why"

"well cuz he wasnt sure how you were gonna react and he wanted to find the right moment to tell you"

"oh"

and then i immediately flashback to all the other times all of other friends have gotten engaged and how I blow it all out of proportion and end up yelling and crying.

a little hurt and a little embarrased, i say "ah yeah...I guess that makes sense."

It hurts a little that I couldnt be immediately told the greatest news ever (short of my own engagement of course) because I am a raging bitch and make it all about me. me! ME! But I know it's my own fault. That also makes me a little sad and ashamed of myself.


Here's where I make it about me (but, seriously, in a good way): I am proud of my reaction to her engagement, it makes me feel like maybe, just maybe I am growing up some. I like that I did not make it about me or say "TICK TOCK DAMNIT WTF?" I like that I was genuinely happy for the girl that for so many years has shared the pain and frustration and self-hatred over being the last to get married. and the fact that we have both been dating our BFs since before most of these other people even KNEW their wives/husbands. and well, general angst.

I am now alone in my little angsty club. But thats ok. Knowing that she is now engaged leaves me with the satisfaction of knowing that yes, someday, it will happen.

Congrats K, I love you and am so happy for you.

of Tantrums and Retardness

When I first heard about the slight possibility of moving to Virginia, I thought "K, ya'll have a good time, I'll be here if you need me!" Since I was living in the dorm, my parents left for Virginia without me. Sweet jesus, can you smell the freedom? *sniff* I sure can!

And with said newfound freedom! I shall! Not go to class! Ever!

Which is pretty ironic since I had perfect attendance in high school up until my senior year when my mom let me take "senior skip day." Yeah, I was that girl. I did pretty average in high school too. Nothing extraordinary. Took some honors classes. but oh my! never the "GT" classes! GT = Gifted and Talented. Honored I am, yet Gifted and Talented? not so much. I graduated in the middle of my class since the first half had all 4.0's and above. I would go to the overachiever school...

oops, where was I...?

Right so, Spring break came along and I got to go to Virginia! Yay! Cold! freezing! omfg its still snowing? Virginia. I, being the ultimate spoiled brat, was not a happy camper cuz everyone else was going to the beach (eeps! bathing suit!) or something similar. Which meant that where ever they were going they were sure to return with a nice tan/sunburn. I, on the other hand, would return with frost bite. I was sure of it.

Spring break ended up being alright since I was still absolutely sure that there was no way in hell that I was moving here. Seriously? its friggin MARCH and it's still cold? F. that.

Yes well, remember "freedom! I shall!. . ."

Fail the semester!

Nice work Trish!

So, I was forced to move with no hope of return upon the end of my 4 month vacation freshman spring semester.

man o man, the drama queen emerged with a verocity I had yet seen. I cried! I yelled! I cried! I stomped around! I was rude and hateful!

Then I got my grades! and hid in my room!

and that was that. for weeks I was a mopey little spoiled brat who should have been smacked quite a few times. I cried silently in my room. I talked to my friends back in TX on the phone scheming on how I could get back there. Having no money and no job though was not helping the plans. I WROTE SAD POETRY, people! I mean how old was I again? 18? Really? Act like it, ya retard! Always taking the victim role when it is my own damn fault. Interesting.

This is right about the time that I met the bf and everything changed...

---To Be Continued---

Of Fireflies and snowflakes. . .

Last night I went outside before bed--yes damnit, to smoke--and I noticed this little light show I was witnessing. I was standing out on the deck facing the little forest behind our house and these little neon green twinkles would emerge every so often. Like a lot of them! It was one of those moments where you stop and notice nature and are suddenly really greatful to be alive and witnessing all its miracles.

I remember my first summer in Virginia--(kicking and screaming--and yes! more on that later, I swear). I had already met the feller that I am still with today *swoon*, I got over myself and the kicking and screaming. . .

cuz really, you can only act like a spoiled brat for so long before you realize that you are being a freaking spoiled brat and cease the retarded act with a quickness. I have a sneaky suspicion the sudden change of heart was directly related to meeting the bf, hehe ;) --but seriously! more on that later!

. . . and started to accept my new home. One sticky summer evening, my mom called me into the kitchen with such an urgency in her voice that I didn't even hesitate running to her side. She was peering out the kitchen window. Before I could say anything snotty about the unnecessary urgency she said "just look outside Trishy, just look." So I looked out the window. I kept looking for someone or something that would cause such an urgent beckoning, and then a little twinkle caught my eye! Look! over there! DID YOU SEE THAT?! and then oh! over there too! and oh! look! over there! I caught myself saying this outloud and feeling like I was 5 again, excited and washed over with wonder. We stood there for a long time just watching the fireflies dance around in our backyard and that is one of my fondest memories of my first few months in Virginia.

In the winter, the same exact scenario happened the night of the first snowfall of the season. Being from Texas, I hadn't seen actual snow since I was in 3rd grade.

--THE PART WHERE I FLASHBACK TO THIRD GRADE: They shut down our school. My dad came to get me and my friend (we lived across the street from the elementary school). I remember slipping in the crosswalk (no shock there) while holding my Dad's hand as we (attempted) to cross the street to our apartment complex. I remember playing in the snow and how the snow seeped into my knit gloves (cuz, WHY would you need water resistant gloves in Texas?). I remember how much the snow hurt my fingers because it was so cold.

I remember it all melting later that day, and being so disappointed to see my new friend go so quickly.

--END THIRD GRADE FLASHBACK--

I remember rushing over to the window again, certain there was going to be no fireflies at this time of the year. I stopped mid-stride halfway to the window and saw snowflakes! Real live snowflakes! My mom and I smiled at each other and giggled and hurried to put on our shoes on and coats over our pajamas. We went out on the deck, I watched my mom stick her arms out, palms up, face to the sky....

and then she stuck her tongue out with a big grin on her face.

I remember thinking I was seeing, if just for a moment, what she was like when she was a young girl. I mimicked her and we began twirling in circles on the deck, giggling and smiling. And then I noticed my Dad looking at us through the window, shaking his head "damn southeners" is what I imagine him thinking (he grew up in New York and is no stranger to the white stuff).

Anyway, now that I have been here for 10 years, each time I encounter the fireflies or the snowflakes it stops me dead in my tracks and makes me smile and think just how lucky I am. and how I should really call me mom and tell her I love her and how she made life that much more memorable. :P

the one where she recalls random crap and wants to tell you about it

So I was outside smoking taking in the fresh air (whatever, shut-up) and noticed a teeny tiny car with one of those driving school signs on the top. The person was pulling out of the parking lot and making a left onto the street...

ever sooooooo sloooooooowwwwllllly.

and I didnt really think anything about it until I looked away and then looked back and realized, "holy crap, she is STILL turning!"

now, ok, perhaps this is an exaggeration and I have no idea how long she really took but holy moley! it seemed like FOR. EV. ER.

This made me think about when I started driving...(and then I thought Hey! I can blog this! Ya know, the thought process of a normal person...)

I learned to drive when I moved here. I dunno why I never bothered to get my license with all the normal people at 16 but I didnt. I had no interest once so ever, and all my friends had cars and licenses so why bother? also. my dad sort of had this unwritten whispered rule about kids not driving til they were 18.

which, now that I am older? that is a fine fine rule, I mean have you seen those fools drive?

Anyway, when I moved here kicking and screaming (more on that later), my Dad informed me that the sweet '86 T-bird he was driving was going to be mine when he purchased a new car. Once that car was officially mine, man I couldn't stay out of the thing. I'd nervously back it out of the garage (with a big ass grin on my face) and then proceed to wash or wax the thing--like every other day. This was all I could do with it cuz I had not yet acquired my license.

My mom did let me drive it around the neighborhood with her as passenger when Dad was at work but shhhhhhhhhh dont tell.

So when it finally came time for me to get my license, I was 18. Virginia rules are (or were anyway) all hokey about "older new drivers." Bascially, I only had to acquire so many hours of driving time then I could take the written and driving test at the DMV, but I had to wait til I turned 19 (yeah, wtf?).

So we set up my driving lessions to acquire the "driving time." I was all sick with nervous excitement that morning as I waited for my instructor to arrive. She pulled up in this like geo metro which was a little disappointing though I am not sure why I expected to drive some really nice car. I get in the driver's seat. She points out some stuff, has me adjust my mirrors and then she goes "OK! anytime you are ready!" And this is where my hands start to get all shakey cuz jesus christ dontcha ease people into this at all? No? not so much?

So she has me drive to the GW Parkway. Thats right, death road itself. I'm driving along with the grip of steel on the steering wheel, trying to remember to check my mirrors and dont go too fast! and I guess I was hugging the shoulder some cuz I kept driving over those drains on the side of the road and it would make a loud noise but I didnt wanna move closer to the inside cuz! OMG! theres cars driving past me! I could get too close! Even though the chick kept saying "uhm you might wanna move closer to the inside of your lane. Meanwhile, I just kept thinking "yeah right, who's driving! WHO!" and then i noticed the exact same driving set up in front of her in the passenger seat. weird little cars those things are.

I remember the drains vividly, and even when I drive the parkway now I think about it and make it a point to not drive over them. But when I do, the noise isnt as loud as I remember it.

Anyway so long story short (heh) I failed my first test cuz it was drizzling and I was too nervous to notice that the few drops on the window were TOTALLY impairing my view and I did not use my wipers! gasp! the horror!

I ended up having to take the driving test again and I passed and then they informed us about a little rule that I could not take the written test until my 19th birthday. As luck would have it, my birthday fell on the same day that fall semester started and gasp! I had to totally drive myself to my first day of school. So i drove my car to the dmv (shhh) while my parents drove behind me. I took my test and drove to school...

WITH MY PARENTS BEHIND ME THE ENTIRE TIME.

holy crap i felt like i was going to kindergarten all over again or something.

My dad has this thing where he cant pull into a spot and be happy with it ...OH NO! he has to pull out and repark at least twice. He slows down while driving through green lighted intersections cuz! it could totally change any second now and ya gotta be ready for it!

My cousin once side-swiped a PARKED car on her right side. Her excuse was that she cant see the right side of her car and she cant be held responsible for whatever she hits on that side.

These are my genes people!

(and p.s. im driving the carpool this week *snicker* WATCH OUT BITCHES IM COMIN THROUGH!)

Flashback...the good kind

Fun for Days! Click Me!

My god! This reminds me of that one summer. *happy sigh*

omg!

A-HA! and the drawlings! (my name is simon, and I like to do drawlings!)

I miss real MTV. and dont give me that poop about MTV2--it ain't the same I don't care what anybody says.

Adam Ant. heh. my brother, the one I referenced earlier, was Adam Ant for consecutive Halloween's and he ALWAYS won the costume contest. Always. It was always weird for me though to see him wearing make-up. My mom always did his make-up. (tee hee) and my dad would fidget nervously cuz OMG! his son was wearing make-up! The horror! What's next? Pink Polos and an earring?

oops yeah that did come very soon there after, heh. But in a manly way. No! Really! MANLY PINK! MANLY EARRING!

anyway. check out the videos, ill stop mumbling over here.

the one where she says random shit

Is it weird that I'm walking around the house singing "freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee creditreportDOTcom" and its just me and the cats?

Im asking cuz they are looking at me strange.

What? It's a catchy tune.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remember when I said I never go to bars anymore?

WELL...

I went! and with people from work!

and!

I had a freakin blast!

and! some dude walked up and started hitting on me by saying "so, you guys here together?" (all the girls were on the dance floor... ya know, like girls do) and i said "YAH! and our boyfriends are RIGHT OVER THERE! *points*"

he said "oh" nodded, and stepped backwards.

that uh, counts as being hit on, right?

and, btw?

wendys + 2 glasses of water + 2 advil + 1 Vitamin pack = no hangover!

sweet jesus, no hangover! *happy sigh*

Because making lists is fun!

Things I wanna do before I die (eww, morbid):

1. Sky Dive
2. LEAVE THE GODDAMN CONTINENTAL US ... like many times.
3. Walk into a room without thinking "god. please dont look at me, dont look at me"
4. Have a close knit group of very close friends that I have known for decades.
5. Get married (you knew that was coming, come on!)
6. Have kids (come on, seriously)
7. Be OUT OF DEBT
8. Hike the appalachian trail (and NO not the whole thing, sheesh dont be crazy...I live in reality)
9. Be comfortable in my skin and no longer worried about what others think about me.
10. First impression of me be "wow, she is cool" rather than "fucking snob! who the hell does she think she is!" -- yes, many have told me that later after we became friends. Apparently my shyness comes off as snobby bitchyness. awesome. :( oh wait..didnt I just say #9. oops.
11. stop being so contradictory within myself.
12. stop seeing all the flaws when I look in the mirror
13. stop being so goddamn emotional. my eyes well up with tears over commercials. COMMERCIALS. blah.
14. stop taking everything so personally. its not always about me (wtf? its not?!?!)
15. stop feeling like a poser and be a real person.
16. have more positive than negative things to say about myself
17. move back to texas *heart*
18. see the sistine chapel.
19. see the great wall of china
20. see where the berlin wall was
21. see mount rushmore
22. see the grand canyon
23. USE MY DAMN CAMERA
24. go to the gym on a regular basis. and like it.
25. be thin.
26. be more outdoorsy.
27. run a marathon
28. learn to ride a bike (I really dont know if I mean this one really, cuz uhh what 28 year old rides around with training wheels? :D)
29. enjoy turning 30 rather than flipping the hell out.
30. be far less lazy.
31. do volunteer work. (although heh! my mom and I used to volunteer at a homeless shelter for thanksgiving and dish out food -- ok only 2 years but c'mon that counts!)
32. have some kind of positive affect on the world.
33. live each day like its my last
34. learn to roller skate (ha, yeah right! IMA FALL! NOOOO!)
35. not freak out when i see ice on the ground
36. erase the introvert.
37. think of the beach and go "ahhhh" instead of "ewww bathing suit!"
38. take an art class cuz i wanna and love it instead of worrying about how I am not good enough
39. get my masters degree (ha *gulp*)
40. win an award for something (or hell, MANY things!) I designed.
41. enter a design contest. cuz really #40 wont happen unless i do, no?
42. follow a skin-care regimen for longer than a week.
43. MOISTURIZE!
44. take better care of myself.
45. go to france (oui!)
46. stop blaming others when its really my own damn fault.
47. Ride a motorcycle (even riding on the back of one scares the crap out of me)
48. stop being so goddamn scared of everything.
49. go whale watching. sea world really didnt cut it for me. OR the voyage of the mimi (ha! remember that?)
50. wear a bikini and know I look good.
51. walk around in heels and not be all "OMG am I walking funny? am I?"
52. Go to Germany during Oktoberfest. YAY BEER!
53. Go home for Fiesta week. YAY BEER!
54. See Ireland. YAY BEER!
55. Drink less beer. :P
56. save money.
57. stop buying shit that will fit "soon". weirdo.

umm wow, i better get crackin!

100 things about me. . .

While trolling (who, me?!?!) I've noticed that many a-blogger have done this 100 things about me...uh thing so I thought I'd give it a go.

1. My mom calls me "trishy"
2. My brothers call me "lil' bit"
3. I like nicknames, makes me feel cool
4. Most days, I feel so not cool.
5. I have small feet.
6. I was once asked in high school how I stay standing upright with the small feet.
7. I hated high school.
8. I can't quit smoking. No really I've tried.
9. Like 039203982039428 million times.
10. Im sure I will keep trying, cuz, I mean what else is there to do.
11. All my life, I have always wanted a kitten. (to hug and squeeze and love and name him george!)
12. I have a kitten, her name is maddy. oh and another kitty, named Blackberry.
13. close!
14. I love music.
15. I have an obscene number of cd's
16. I buy cd's whenever I get the chance.
17. must.get.more. *twitch*
18. hey so I do have a hobby, how bout that.
19. I've worked at the same place since I was 19.
20. I've lived here in virginia since i was 19.
21. I grew up in Texas.
22. I heart Texas.
23. I hate snow.
24. I fall...like a lot.
25. I have a fear of falling down stairs ever since I was carrying laundry down and fell and sprained my ankle.
26. I also sprained my ankle while walking to the ATM outside my office building.
27. Graceful, I am not.
28. Nor coordinated, apparently.
29. I went to Four colleges and had FOUR majors
30. I suck at making good decisions.
31. It took me EIGHT years to finish my bachelors degree.
32. hang on, im still digesting #31 -- jesus effing christ!
33. Way way WAY deep down, I think I am pretty.
34. When I walk by a reflective surface, I look fast so people dont think I am vain.
35. I cant be vain though, seriously.
36. I break the rules at work most days (hey, isnt it work time now?), and do not wear pantyhose. I know, rebel!
37. I have a very bad temper. very.
38. I am mean and evil in an argument. you WILL get your feelings hurt.
39. I am satan's spawn when angry.
40. I hate that about myself.
41. I see myself in my mother almost every time I see her. and that scares me to death.
42. I also see myself in my father too. gah!
43. I wish I took more pictures of me and my friends.
44. I have 5 pictures of the bf and I --- over the course of 10 years.
45. yes. i do own a camera.
46. and no, obviously I dont use it.
47. hah im cheating arent i
48. im part spanish and part german with some irish thrown in there for fun.
49. depending on what i am doing and who i am around determines which part of me i flaunt.
50. HEY IM SPANISH! OLE!
51. HEY IM GERMAN! WHATEVER THEY SAY!
52. HEY IM IRISH! KISS ME!
53. heh.
54. I see my nephew very rarely. and he lives 5 minutes from my office.
55. Im an awful aunt.
56. his mother sucks though. big time.
57. im now looking around for things.
58. i have my very own REAL coach purse. that i bought off e-bay.
59. wheeee im cool now.
60. im in MAD debt. (see #29)
61. I drive a saturn
62. I LIKE MY SATURN SHUT UP!
63. I hate doing the dishes and cleaning bathrooms.
64. I hate how there is never enough time in the day for it all.
65. I drive with my music loud and act all badass.
66. Im totally badass.
67. Yes, I do do (heh doodoo) the thing where I put my windows up if I roll up next to someone cooler. cuz gah. im not badass at all.
68. I wanna be badass.
69. I continuously say "god, I've GOT to clean this purse out!"
70. I clean my purse out maybe once a month and repeat #69 the next day.
71. I have no kids, I am not married. I so want all that.
72. Deep down, I think I am too selfish to have kids.
73. When someone hands me a baby, I freeze up.
74. I think im awfully funny.
75. I love people that make me laugh.
76. I drink very rarely (now).
77. I miss going to bars.
78. Im too old for bars.
79. Im not good enough
80. Im not pretty enough
81. Im not hot enough (or ya know, at all.)
82. I feel inadequate all the time.
83. yet. i rock so hard. hows that work?
84. I live with the guy that I will always love with my entire heart. always.
85. he drives me effing batty! ;)
86. my mom used to sing songs to me and play with my hair.
87. I have never jumped out of a plane, but god I want to one day.
88. I have never left the continental united states.
89. I love the beach, hate bathing suits.
90. The first time I went to the beach, I was 14 (I think). It was corpus christi, riiiiiiight after the oil spill. very nice.
91. baby oil removes tar.
92. I love rollercoasters.
93. I have gone on so many rollercoasters in one day, that in bed that night, I still felt as though I was on one.
94. was also nauseous all night.
95. I like that I am short and fairly teeny, it makes me feel girly. small hands. small feet.
96. ugh small boobs. bleh.
97. I read, but not enough.
98. I love my friends to pieces.
99. I am bad at keeping in touch.
100. my first concert was paula abdul. at sea world. aww yeah. COLD HEARTED SNAKE!

whew.

Dear man stepping on my head. . .

First of all,

WTF did I do to you?!?! I don't deserve this! I am a nice girl. I follow the rules. I stop when the light turns yellow, NO REALLY I DO (alright I lie, sometimes I do).

Why did you come around? I don't believe I sent out a formal invitation. I don't believe that I requested to be out of work for FOUR GODDAMN DAYS (though, to be technical, the first was a prescheduled vacation day--that I spent in bed. poo.) to sleep all the living day and be all congesty and coughing and EWW coughing up stuff! Which, btw, very sexy. thanks for that.

The dizziness, the no appetite (though, I will admit this was a bonus, I do feel lighter on my feet today!), the HEAD SO HEAVY that I feel like a newborn and can't keep it up. The constant cough drops, the constant water, gatorade, chicken soup. You have ruined my taste buds! Nothing tastes good! Nothing! The incessant low-grade fever. The friggin GUILT for calling in SICK three days in a row! The horrible feeling the entire time I was in the doctors office cuz gah! I wanna be back in bed now now now. The having the voice of a man (yeah baby!) for 5 days. you are all about the sexy, huh. The going through all the tissue boxes in the house! how the hell? The daytime TV...my LORD the daytime TV. Im glad I work days cuz...gah! and the cough. really? why was that necessary? as if the congestion and pressure, etc. werent enough.

Thankfully, you are finally leaving, albeit slowly, but I do feel the pressure subsiding. For which, I am forever grateful.

In the future please know, you aren't welcome here.

and also?

can you speed the leaving up already?

kisses,

90% healed girl

oh, P.S. I HATE YOU.

yeah, right...oh, I mean...thanks?

So lately theres been an issue that keeps popping up with me that I guess I am just now realizing...I cannot take a compliment to save my life!

It's all related to my self-image (or lack thereof) which affects both personal and professional aspects of my life.

Take, for example, the time I took a co-worker to lunch who was getting ready to leave the company. We're merrily eating our salad and bread, discussing her recent engagement (*sigh* and *doublesigh* oh also, yayyyyyyy congrats!) when she stops and looks at me and goes "ok are you ready for my speech?" I look around me sorta confused cuz uhh...im the only one here? I figured it was some kind of goodbye speech about how she enjoyed working at the company and blah blah (ya know, the usual BS). Instead she starts off with "I think you are an amazing designer."

me: uh...*blink*

She continues talking about how great my work is and how much my work has improved since she has been with the company and how creative I am and how resourceful! and how, if I dont know the answer or how to do something, I figure it out and dont just give up and...

me: thinking "wow, whats with the bullshit?"

and she continues on about how much I rule and how if I ever wanted to leave the company to please contact her cuz she would hire me in a second and blah blah blah..

me: thinking "oh, she's serious?!?!"

and, oh yes, she continues on and on ...

me: thinking "seriously, why does she feel the need to blow smoke up my ass?"

and then she said something that sorta stopped me. she said "Name, Name, and Name also think so, we discuss it often. They sing your praises when people go to our website and comment on the design...and blah blah blah..."

she continues talking, but I sorta start...tearing up (wtf)? and thinking "others think this too? no shit?"

Personally, I think I am a mediocre designer who has mild strokes of creativeness once in a blue moon. Most days, my stuff aint all that great. There are days where I am supremely proud of myself and "hey, I came up with that noise, yes, ME"--of course 2-3 days (hours) later I am already hating on it. There isnt much that I have designed that I still actually like.

The day this girl left the company she gave me an envelope. Walking back to my desk, I opened it. It was the same speech but on paper, the first line says "Im writing this down so that you will remember it and one day believe it."

*gulp*

So second example:

I get a voicemail on my work phone from some chick, she says she "would really love to talk with me" and that she "has heard awesome things about my work."

me: uhh..."receptionist must've directed call wrong"--nevermind that she said my name in the message.

So I don't call back. Later that same day, she calls again. She is a headhunter and was given my name by someone in Blacksburg who "just raves about how great a designer you are"

me: thinking "ok, this is a joke. ha. very funny."

she then says "so i have this creative director position that I am looking to fill, from what I hear, you are the perfect candidate...blah blah blah...would love to see your portfolio...blah blah blah...would you be interested"

me: "uhh, well Im not sure I have the experience for such a high-level position. I really am good where I am right now, but thank you."

Tricia you are an idiot, wtf?! and p.s. tricia, its time to update your portfolio.

3rd example:

I am talking to my friend after a staff meeting at work. Im half confident that day cuz I look pretty darn cute, and the other half is all consumed with the feeling of slobbiness cuz GAH! frickin linen skirts wrinkle so fast, it drives me crazy!

So a co-worker kinda walks over and says "ohhh, you look very nice today! I love that skirt"

to which I respond with "ugh. i swear i ironed it!"

again, wtf?

all this is starting to make me wonder like, how in the world did I get this way, is there any way out of it. And, am I still at the same company for going on 10 years cuz I dont think I can do any better? (and why do I suddenly feel like Carrie Bradshaw with the way im talking?)

I need confidence in myself and my abilities (and screw the skirt, im still cute!). I need to mend my self-image with a quickness or I will not ever be successful in life, in work, in love.

I wonder if they sell confidence on e-bay?

Ha! they do indeed!

I heart carpooling *happy sigh*

okokok so it's only the first day of it but SWEET JESUS I LOVE IT ALREADY!

I Didn't spend forever in barely moving traffic on 95, we saw an accident seconds after it happened and I didnt get all paranoid about getting hit like I normally do, cuz HA I WASNT DRIVING WHEEEEEEEE!

I am a tad neurotic (and those that know me...shoosh! ;P ) about locking my car so im, ya know, sorta worried about whether I locked my car or not--"OH SHIT DID I LOCK MY CAR? WAIT! I did I did! phew. NO WAIT DID I????"-- yeah uh huh sorta worried.

Also, cuz I didnt drive and I didnt have to sit in traffic forever, this translates into me being in an actual happy mood right when I get to work instead of it taking me an hour to get over myself and then get in the good mood, like usual. Who'da thought?

Im also only slightly worried about my car being parked at a place where cd's got stolen out of a car. gasp! My CD's NONONONO! hehe...im only kidding *cough* here... love you harmsmony *mua*

I hope we can carpool tomorrow too, woot!

Move along, nothin to see here...

So I stroll on into work about 6:14 which TOTALLY counts as 6:00 (shut-up, YES IT DOES). All in a happy-ish mood (I mean really, how happy can you be at this hour), log on to my computer and the glorious little envelope pops up. Yay! Email! I go check email. An Email from a friend! weee! My eyes travel over to the subject line and my heart sinks a little as I read "She said Yes." So I open the email hoping its a joke of some kind cuz thats what I usually get from him.

nope.

He proposed to his girlfriend and She said YES! Yay!

Now, dont get me wrong I am COMPLETELY happy for him. Seriously, love and happiness and all that.

but sonofalsdkfjoewifhoweihoweijhglejkfs WHATS WRONG WITH ME???

Im not gonna bore you with my relationship woes (much) cuz really, if you know me it would only be repetitive. The boyfriend and I have discussed this (ad nauseum if you ask him). So I know what the issues are. So I should be fine. And I am for the most part (I SAID FOR THE MOST PART). Its just when shit pops up like this im like "ugh, there HAS to be something wrong with me"

I immediately blame myself. Why? I dunno, cuz really? I am the most awesomest girl out there (fo sho)!

blah.

so I will continue to sit and wait for that day. I honestly am not sure how much longer I can do this though. Im finding myself lately shutting down, shutting out, building walls. Which, yeah no shit, is no good. Maybe I am in denial and already know sub-consciously what the outcome will be and am just protecting myself from all the hurt that is coming? OR maybe im sabotaging the relationship with the one person I am most comfortable with, the one guy who I can totally see growing old with, the one guy who knows all my buttons to push and does--yet even when I am most angry I still love him so much and the one guy who loves me for me (even though I am a raging bitch). no questions asked. and I am ruining it cuz im friggin selfish and trying to comply with this time in my head that I should be married by (yes, 30), or that ya know after 10 years, its time to take that next step already (really, says who? ME DAMNIT ME!). Things can never be perfect and there are never any guarantees, I tell him and WOW maybe I should listen to my own advice. WHO CARES IF IM THE LAST ONE TO GET MARRIED ON THE FRIGGIN PLANET.

me :(


oh and P.S. yes this is a whiney blog because HELLO im a girl! This is what I do best! so stuffit!

If the TV died, I wouldn't cry. . . AT ALL.

I've been in this weird mood lately...

all kinda depressed and

listenin to mellowish music and

thinking about life! and omg!WhatDoIDo! meh. and

every chance I get the damn TV gets turned off

off pls.

die tv die.

all we do is watch tv. we waste hours lazing in front of the tv doing nothing of course cuz! omg! we gotta make room for the new stuff coming!

Is it possible to burn out on TV, cuz dude, I totally am. I never thought this would happen.

burnt.

toast.

Like, right now, the season finale of Lost is being watched and OMG!I. DONT. CARE. I have laptop in lap, headphones on. I say "huh?!" a lot cuz the boyfriend is in denial of me having said headphones on.

70's show finale on now. Hey btw, should I admit out loud that I just figured out (or OK boyfriend told me, fine. FINE.) that Fes's name stands for...

wait for it...

Foreign
Exchange
Student

*faint* I KNOW!

how the hell did i not get that?

TINA! Come Get Your Ham!

GOSH!! (I...dunno...I thought it was funny)

So, I have started an entry every day since my last posting.

I click on new entry and then

*crickets*

hey so, my blog's name isn't that far off after all huh?

oh and also?

Dear Man driving VW bugbeetle (whatever it is!) this morning,

Sweet sweet fellow, I realize that you got up on time, and you have your morning coffee and all is right with the world, and whenever you get to work is when you get to work. But--and trust me when I say this--this is not the case for everyone.

It really is imperative that you drive faster than this.

Must. keep.up.with.car.in.front.of.you.

COME. ON!

Traffic? Meh. I understand the complacency, but...seriously? Reading the newspaper? Is that not a steering wheel in front of you? You are letting all the goobers in because you are not paying attention!

Yes love, we are merging, true. But that really doesn't mean you need to let the ENTIRE lane in.

SERIOUSLY STOP READING AND EFFING DRIVE MOTOEIUR(O#*UT)#(IURPOEKR.

Oh and? Your hair looks beauuuuutiful, stop primping! You Self-centeredPieceof0w8eut90w84eut0o9wiutfgo0weu9g!

Kisses,

Ticked off Chick behind you

P.S. You car is for girls. It comes with a flower. A. FLOWER.

UPDATE: ok,the car comes with a vase for a flower. semantics. ITS STILL FOR A FLOWER! YOU GIRL!

ok I feel all better now.

Witty Title

Just now, I paused my iTunes so I could sneeze...once I sneezed, I pressed play.

what the ?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Last night, I had a girl moment. And I mean a total girlOnTheBrinkBigFatCrocodileTears moment cuz--oh! speaking of fat--I am. Normally, this is a lingering thought that tugs at my self conscience of which, I do nothing about.

usually.

well instead.

this time.

unlike last time.

or that other time.

(how long can i do this one sentence per line crap you ask).

that long.

oh heh. ANYWAY. on with the story-- I went to the gym, at the boyfriends suggestion (god love him). and so I went. Man, I kicked some elliptical ass! Usually, when I hop on to the elliptical, I start out slow and gradually work up to something that equals a sweaty girl cuz GOD! that machine is evil. Ow!

Not this time. oh no. I was p.i.s.s.e.d. off and ellipticalled (totally made that up) with a vengence. Whats more, everytime I felt I was being judged by some moronic (right? cuz you cant possibly have all those muscles and be hot AND have intelligence...that wouldn't be fair) muscle boy who could possibly be, but HIGHLY UNLIKEY (duh), looking my way...I would hit it harder.

Seriously, by the time I was done, my lungs were burning. and as I walked over to the spray and towel to clean my beaten-up machine (as all good gym people do, right! right?), I was seriously worried my legs were gonna give out. I felt all shakey and ...

accomplished.

YEAH TAKE THAT JIGGLY FAT.

and. HOLY SHIT DID YOU SEE ME BEAT THAT MACHINE UP! DIDJA? CUZ. I TOTALLY BEAT IT UP!

Today I have the reminants of a severe elliptical beating...toosh and stems slightly achy. But, yeah, I totally won this time.

I'm so happy about it, I just might go back tonight. You can't hide from me, Mr. Elliptical!

oh and! I weighed myself before I left the gym, and turns out? I've only gained 1.5 lbs. since I last went to the gym --which was march. not bad, eh? also, 21 days=3weeks of non-smoker life *flex* take that, nonHavingFaithInMeMoFo's!

Literal Boy Strikes Again!

OK, I don't know if this is all guys or just my guy but...

the dude can never discuss a hypothetical...like ever.

Like if I were to say "what if you lived on the moon, what kinda job would you have?" (and no, Im not usually random like that) to which he would respond with "but I dont live on the moon"

"yeah but, say you did"

"well I cant though, cuz I don't"

rar!

I bring this up cuz we had one of those moments towards the end of our Phoenix trip. I was really feeling like we were totally disrupting their lives cuz we didnt rent a car. To protect the innocent, I will call them "Goose" and "Carol" (Ya know, Tom Cruise's pal on Top Gun and his wife (meg ryan)...cuz he is a fighter pilot and she's...well she is his wife). So Goose told us not to, that they had two cars and it would be fine. So we didn't.

Well, 1. we (ok, maybe just I) forgot that you cant just take off 5 days from the Air Force at the drop of a hat...cuz it doesnt work like that. And 2.when you get visitors during finals, you still have to study and take your tests, no way around that! We (I) had no idea "Carol" had finals during the time we were there, I would have insisted on a reschedule of our trip.

So the "working it out" ended up being us taking "Carol" to and from school every day. Which wasn't a big deal on our part, but, that had to be so not convenient for her.

So Im trying to explain this to my boyfriend (I have yet to come up with a code name for him)...

"Let's say the shoe was on the other foot and Goose asked you if he should rent a car, you would totally say "yeah no! dont rent a car! we've got two cars! we can work it out!" yet when it came down to it, it didnt really work out because I ended up having to work and so did you...see what i mean?"

to which he responded:

"No, cuz we have three cars."

*raises eyebrow*

All signs point to GO THE EFF HOME!

So, im still pissed off about nothing. Which is always pleasant. The highlight of my day thus far has to be. . .

It's 1:30, I leave work at 3:00 and I figured it was about time for lunch. For whatever reason, I am not real hungry today, usually im starving by 11:00. Anyway so I go to the kitchen and make myself a sandwich from the stuff I brought in. I refill my water bottle and I go back to my desk. I unscrew the water bottle, open my Crystal Light Raspberry Ice (red, very red) on the go packet and pour it in. screw back on bottletop. Shakey shakey. "OH SHIT" I say outloud as red stuff drips off me and the WHITE WALL behind me. I didnt close the pop-top.

WHO DOES THAT?

Yeah, me.

So I go to the bathroom, wet some towels, grab some dry ones, wipe off the red stuff that is dripping (yeah, no shit--how the hell??!?!?!) out of my hair onto my neck. pat down the rest of my WHITEfrickin blouse, and hurry back to the wall. This stuff stains! Holy hell, it stains my kitchen counters at home all the time. Walking back to my desk I plot how I will get off what I can and then bring in one of those Mr. Clean Erasers tomorrow morning and fix it all. I sit down and commence cleaning. IT ALL COMES OFF! whew. Trust me if you knew why I would be freaking out, you'd be whew'n too.

So yeah, but the blouse is a goner im sure.

Guh, can I go home now?

btw, you will notice that this is being posted at 2pm. I mean, who doesn't think "oh I totally gotta blog this!" RIGHT AFTER something happens to them?
....No? Just Me?
*blink*

You people make my ass twitch

bad mood.

bad bad bad.

dont talk to me, I dont care.

shutup shutup shutup.

dont come near me. I will bite your head off for no reason.

*seethe*

Dear Bubba,

Today is your birthday, and for some reason my mind is awash with memories...

That summer, instead of working, you took care of me while Mom and Dad worked. Taking care of me (as I remember it) consisted of watching MTV all day, and then cleaning up in the last half hour before mom and dad were due to come home. I remember the Duran Duran video with the lady with the weird make-up and the white suited fellers. I remember Thriller and the scary dead people, and you telling me it wasnt real it was just make-up. I remember the subsequent nightmares. I remember you making me watch the making of the Thriller video to prove the make-up story and me still having nightmares ;). I remember helping dry the dishes then you telling me to go sit down while you finished putting the dishes away. I never said anything but I distinctly remember seeing you pull the dishes back out after you thought I left and re-drying them cuz, well i was 4 or 5 and not very thorough I guess. I remember you trying to teach me to walk without looking down, though surely, that was way earlier in life? I remember how frustrated I was hehe. But, I got it!

I remember those really hot, humid nights and you telling me to "think cool" and me trying so hard and lied and told you it worked. :P

Later on in life, you tried to teach me how to ride a bike. Remember how I ended up freaking out on a hill when a car came? My mouth met the curb and that was that. I remember waking up from sleeping after the accident and saw you fixing my bike. I remember feeling guilty that I let you down. To this day, I do not know how to ride a bike, and to this day, I still feel guilty.

Later still, you tried to teach me how to drive stick in your pick-up truck. I remember shifting gears, or trying to, and you yelling "STOP STOP STOP" and me completely forgetting where the brake was. I remember you somehow pulling the key out of the ignition as we head straight for a telephone poll, and sitting there still and quiet as you returned your heart and stomach to their rightful locations. Meanwhile, Im like, "hey fun, can we do it again!?!?!"

I remember one night when you were home from college, going for a ride in your white vw bug with a black trunk (ha) and we saw one of those spotlights in the sky. We then drove around for a couple of hours trying to find where the spotlight was coming from, which was so exciting to me. Hanging out with my super-cool college brother, and the fact that you wanted to hang out with me? even cooler. I remember another time when you were home from college and you had the cutest puppy dog. You were training him and the puppy peed on the carpet (as they do sometimes). To my shock and horror, you grabbed the puppy dog and rubbed its nose in the carpet where it peed and then put the puppy down. The puppy was wimpering and I felt so bad for the doggy that I reached out to pet it. You yelled at me to not touch her. *sniffle*

I remember your accident and how completely broken (not literally) you were. A week or so (I guess it was) after it happened you flew up here and walked in the door and I gave you a hug and whispered "I love you" in your ear and you started to cry and so did I (heh wow im crying now). You then went upstairs to Mom and Dad's room where Mom was sitting, you got down on your knees, put your head in her lap and cried. I remember later how helpless I felt looking at you through the glass, and how I could do nothing but cry--even though I was trying so hard to not let you see me upset. I remember the letters we wrote back and forth and how I looked forward to your calls. I remember September 11th, but for a different reason. I remember talking to you several times that day, and I remember how scared you sounded. You are a different person now, but in the best way imaginable.

I remember your wedding, and how incredibly happy you were and still are.

My fondest childhood memories all have you in them. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for being there for me and I will treasure these memories forever. But we still have more to make, so lets get to it! ;)

Happy Birthday Bubba, I love you!

Love,

Little Bit

ARIBA..ARIBA..ANDALE!!

Happy Cinco de Mayo!!! (yay!yay!yay!YAY!*highpitchedwhistle*)

heh days like this I miss San Antonio.

Up here in politico-land its just another day. In San Antonio, it'd be another story. I hear mariachi's singing in the background, I see those big paper flowers, bright colors everywhere, awesome food, guacamole on my shirt (sonofa if I cant not spill on myself), happy drinking people. ohhh also fiesta week is coming soon!!! or did it pass already? damnit, see I've been gone too long!

CRAP! I did miss it!!!!

*tear*

alright so anyway, it's also one of my brothers' birthday! How cool is that? Being born on cinco de mayo. I mean really. AND growing up in san antonio where everyone is celebrating your birthday!!! very nice. Course, I highly doubt my mom was all excited about it being cinco de mayo that fateful day.

oh wait, he was born in Germany on an Army base...

well nevermind then!

ah... fiesta week. Note to self: must schedule vacation during this time and go to san antonio NEXT YEAR. hmph.

oh pssssst. btw. today is 2--COUNT EM: UNO, DOS--weeks of non-smoker life. *bow*

Missed me didntcha?

hmm ok maybe not ;)

I went to Phoenix, AZ for 5 nights for some visiting and hanging out with friends. It was nice. It was hot. It was nice and hot. BUT it was a dry heat see, not humid like here, so it was completely bearable.

Im still smoke-free thankyouverymuch. ok ok OK, I did smoke one while I was drinking...
but but but
it did gross me out!

Plus the fact that I only smoked one is totally impressive cuz normally when I have quit and I am drinking and I decide I must smoke I never Ever stop at one (or ten). This time though was different, this time I chose to sloooooow dowwwwwn the drinking instead so that I didnt get super tipsy/drunk and had full control over myself. oh and to not piss off the boyfriend. and actually now that I think about it, I doubt he knew about the one. woopsy. But you gotta admit, I was stealthy!

and by george it worked!

Anyway, so AZ was interesting. Very weird to see like 7 foot cactus (cactii?) where trees would normally be, I kept thinking of those fake backdrops to plays n stuff. Lots of "rock lawns." Which I would totally love, but only cuz im lazy, not cuz it's pretty (at all).

ohhhhhhhh on the excruciatingly long plane ride over (ok, 4.5 hours aint all that bad but it's the longest i've ever been on!) the lady sittin next to me taught me the ways of the sudoku--and holy hell I love this game!

no, hehe, im totally serious. I even went to walgreens while in AZ and bought not one but TWO sudoku puzzle books. anytime we were just sitting around watching tv or whatever, my nose was in my puzzle book.

I shit you not, I was solving sudoku puzzles in my sleep last night.

no, seriously.

I started with the sudoku puzzles in the airline mag, then I moved on to a Sudoku puzzle my friend found in the newspaper when I was apparently twitchy about it. I never solved that one...it was a 5 star one people! I forgot to bring it home with me.

It's still bothering me that I won't be able to solve it. Perhaps I could have her mail it to me?

You think im kidding, but im so not.

and it's not a good thing that I found web sudoku...