Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Fuck! It's Cold!

I actually tried other words and phrases for the title...

"It's Friggin Cold!", which... meh.

"HOLY COLD BATMAN" completely overused by the Author if you ask me

"HOLY MOTHER ITS COLD"... not bad not bad

but I mean. "FUCK! It's Cold!" its...its perfection, sorry.

also, "FUCK! It's Cold Bitches!" also works but slightly over the top, no?

Annnywayyyy.

I have to say that I was probably one of the few who was not complaining when it was like, I dunno SIXTY FIVE DEGREES IN JANUARY. God, that was indeed blissful I must say. And Christmas? at 50 something degrees? WHATS WRONG WITH THAT? Seems perfectly normal to me.

But now. The whiners have won, and it is FUCK.ING. COLD. OUTSIDE! Man. I even have to wear a goddamn coat.

That right there is the worst part. I hate coats. I hate driving while wearing a coat. However, a coat does keep me warm so... there's that.

Lately, I have been having this weird body temperature control issue where IM COLD ALL THE DAMN TIME. Like teeth chattering cold.

Monday, when I came home from work. I sat down in my coat, gloves and scarf ... AND WAS COLD. I sat like that for a good while. Mind you, I was INSIDE the house...ya know... where the heater is on!

Right now, I have my space heater ON my desk FACING ME. It could possibly melt my right side of my face and probably my shoulder. But I? right now? IM COLD STILL. Yet? My ear might melt off. Seriously, I touched my ear and my earrings burnt my hand.

Oh. Speaking of hands. I am developing a bowling callouse on my left thumb.

How sexy am I now? *prance*

I saw this on another blog (haha! a mommyblog too!) and I am totally buying one right now.

So back to me being cold. (cuz really, it is such an interesting topic) I have been going through this routine with my space heater at work. Where I'm all hovering around it, chattering my teeth until I go... hey! I should try some coffee or somethin'! Then I brave the cold hallways and acquire hot chocolate (because I change my mind. I'm allowed.) and then I sit back down and cup both hands around the steaming cup of chocolatey goodness and blow on it and take sips and burn the crap out of my tongue. But! It's ok! It is for a greater cause than my ability to taste! Once I am done, I start doing a bit of work and then I realize...

HOLY CRAP ITS HOT IN HERE! TURN OFF THAT DAMN HEATER!

Then 10 minutes later.

MOTHERF(#*)$)#@(*$)@ NOW ITS COLD.

.... All. Day. Long.

and no, I am not anemic.

I've discussed this with a few people and they sorta look at me like I have no eyebrows and then go "well, maybe you are getting sick?!?"

which! aha! people! don't you know! I AM NOT GETTING SICK THIS WINTER! NO WAY! NO HOW! NUH UH NOT ME! NO SIR!

NO REALLY! I made a pact with myself even! And! The last time I called in sick was September. SEPTEMBER! I cannot break this streak of mine. I will not allow it.

Now, if you will excuse me, I gotta go get my coffee hot chocolate and get this party started.

4 comments:

  1. To me, nothing beats a well placed fuck. Perfect usage and I'm right there with ya. Uh, that sounded dirty but you know what I mean.

    I'm COLD ALL_THE_TIME! Ask Harms and the girls cuz I torture them w/my cold hands every chance I get to steal their body heat! Wait, now I'm worried. Anemia makes ya cold all the time? Are you saying I'm anemic?

    LOVE the pics from this weekend. Your make up looked AWESOME (I notice everyone's make up, it's my curse) and it was great seeing you out. Many kisses, butt slaps, well placed fucks and space heater warmth to ya!

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  2. hehe butt slaps. I have a feeling that is referring to last weekend;s debauchery...

    that i completely remember vividly...

    completely. vivid.

    *blink*

    no really, is the butt slapping from last weekend?

    heh.

    yay to girls night comin soon! Hope to see ya'z there! I think I might even be DD this time :P

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  3. YOU are not allowed to be DD, otherwise who will tell me they love me sooooo much, Barbie and Cluss, that's not enough!!! :)

    and uh, you did not reference WHOM mentioned the coffee on IM, whom gave you that wonderful idea and WHOM got you all hot and warm for about 30 minutes!!! Uh, was that me??? Sometimes I don't need you guys to make me laugh I can do it all by myself. (DIRTY!!!!) Is it Friday yet???

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  4. well ok... if you insist!

    and you are completely correct.

    ahem! PEOPLE!

    LET IT BE KNOWN!

    KEGOFSUNSHINE THOUGHT OF THE COFFEE SOLUTION.

    she is beautiful like that see.

    xoxox ;)

    ReplyDelete